I dreaded the visit. He would not lay still for a moment when we went for the ultrasound of his kidney a couple of weeks ago. Like trying to hold an eel still! It wasn’t easier at the dentist but we had a problem added to the active eel!
It started already out in the waiting room. The dentist came to greet us out there and says to me “I hope you are done having children now! That there will not be any more and that you will take care of yourself!”. Hmmm! Interesting coming from a dentist. All right, we have been going there for years and she is very interested in our religion but… I told her the truth which is that I do not know whether we are done or not. Thought I might as well tell her that we lost baby Serena at 16 weeks in February so that she understood that the thought of another baby is not entirely foreign to us. In my naive way, I thought it would make her say no more on the topic, which is a painful one for me. But she went on and on about how I must take care of myself, that the uterus goes thinner with every pregnancy and that mine could just burst or her exact word was “explode”.
I really like our dentist. She is the best. Has wonderful bedside manners with the children. But I thought it odd that instead of concentrating on “Sparky” and his teeth, she kept the conversation about my poor uterus and how I really should not have another child but take care of myself instead. I kept my calm but felt uncomfortable. After all, all doctors told me that it is just to try again, after Serena’s death. Not a single one told me that I would be in danger. One told me that it might be more difficult to get pregnant since I am no spring chicken. But the last doctor, that was supposed to give an autopsy report, but did not have it, looked at my age in the papers and just said “it’s just to go ahead and try again. Nothing says that it will end this way again!”. All right, the rude young doctor that did the second scraping did say that I should have been content with 7 children and not gone for an 8th but that was her personal feelings shining through, that one should not have more than 2 children in the first place and that anything beyond that is insane.
Did “Sparky” have an exam? Yes, of sorts. He had to be coaxed by me while I was trying to listen to reasons why I should not go through pregnancy again, and now and then I managed to get him to open his mouth. The dentist had to be quick and count teeth during these seconds of open mouth. I guess he had all the teeth he was supposed to because she didn’t say anything at all about his teeth. He happily walked out with a plastic little hippo and a black tooth brush with a crocodile on it.
In about a week and a half I have to take “Dollie” there for her first drilling. Another thing she and her dad held secret from me: The fact that she has her first cavity! They discovered it at the dental hygienist appointment in July. We hope it has taught her not to small eat cookies and candy all day,which I guess all the girls do in the class on a regular basis. Personally I don’t understand this and where she gets the sugar things from since we only have cookies for Birthdays and Christmas and candy, only on Saturdays.
After we got home, I had the option of sitting down with the ADHD book or return to this book that is a real brick volume. Over 830 pages so it is a daunting read in that I wonder when I will ever finish it. BUT it is a fun and interesting read. Biographies are all very well and interesting but there is something special in reading someone’s letters. You write them without thoughts of publication, it is as personal as it can get. You do not usually make yourself more important than you are, if so, it shows through like in the letters Nancy wrote to her sister Diana after the war (II) in the above book. I guess I love reading this book so much because I wish my sister would ever write to me, and be as close as these sisters were. Even though they really had messed up parents and a childhood resembling noone else’s, they were bonded to each other. All right, they were not Louisa May Alcott’s “Little Women”, but is that ever possible? So far, I am not even half way through, but I know when I have finished it, I will feel a tremendous loss.